Another night on what is surely the world’s most intense mini golf course saw garbo Mark Duncan (and his glorious, glorious beard. And shirt. Everything about him is great, really) bag the night’s Holey Moley plaid jacket and golden putter – and a place in the fiercely contested Grand Final to boot.
“Jacket and putter, a small step to get to where I’m going,” said the passionate golfer, who first picked up a putter as a toddler. “The big one’s at the top, $100,000 here I come!”
Mark snatched victory after defeating Jasmine Finlay and Michelle Natoli in a three-way putt off on the Putter Ducky hole, earning his chance to putt for $100,000 on Greg Norman’s top-secret Grand Final hole, the Tomb of Nefer-Tee-Tee.
Brand new Holey Moley holes Surf N’ Turf and Putter Ducky also shared the limelight with trash-talking puppet Agro, who put in a solid performance on The Distractor.
Not content with just shouting the classic “Hey hey hey, it’s Agro!”, it turns out that a puppet can be far harder to ignore than you’d think. With some truly great one-liners like “Can you look at me when I’m talking to you please? Excuse me what is your name?”, “Okay I reckon you’re gonna lose on this hole, I might be a puppet but I reckon you’re the one that’s stuffed”, and my personal favourite, “Michelle, I was thinking of doing a new calendar… Have you ever seen a puppet naked? Check this out.”
And because I know you’re wondering, this is what a naked puppet looks like.
Commentators Matt Shirvington and Rob Riggle made the call, “Agro the ultimate sledger,” and honestly they’re not wrong.
The best part is that it worked, putters Michelle and Taylor missed a few would-be-simple shots. But really, can you blame them?
Tomorrow night, contestants get to take on Holey Moley’s most dangerous hole. In Dragon’s Breath, golfers putt their ball through the drawbridge to the green while four dragons scorch them with fire. Simple enough, right?
Holey Moley continues 7.30pm Wednesday on Channel Seven.
