Most of us have lived through this moment: It’s 12am on a weekday and you’re obsessively scrolling through Pinterest. The clothes, the décor, and nail art, you want it all! But what really takes your fancy is the hair. Unicorn hair, Oil Spill hair, Pastel hair, inspiration hits and you’re now committed to colouring. However, this is not a fashion statement that should be entered into lightly. As a hair dye veteran, there are several down points to dying your hair that the Pinterest posts never show. So before you get too carried away, here are the 6 things they never tell you about getting coloured hair:
1.Your hair is now a flashing neon sign: COME AND BOTHER ME
At first it’s very flattering: “I love your hair!”, “what do you use?”, and “It’s so pretty!” are phrases you’re likely to hear – a lot – once you’ve committed to coloured hair.
Then it gets a little creepy and intense: “I love your hair! Can I touch it?” “I see you’re trying to have dinner with your boyfriend but I feel entitled to know, what do you use?” “It’s SOOOOO pretty!” staring intensifies.
If you’re like me these interactions are the stuff of nightmares. I spend most of my life going out of my way to avoid awkward interactions with strangers, but my hair is like a crazy person magnet. Unfortunately, this is just an aspect of being ‘that coloured haired girl’ that I’ve had to come to terms with. While my inner introvert is screaming, I politely respond “oh …thank you.”
2. You become afraid of washing your hair
It’s been 3 days. You look like an extra from The Walking Dead and people are refusing to sit next to you on the bus. But, damnit, you’re determined to make this dye last. Between the cost of hair dye and the time it takes to redye, your hair washing routine has become one of your top points of concern. There’s something very disheartening about standing in the shower as coloured water washes down you, your dreams of bright hair running, literally, down the drain. Cleanliness and coloured hair become a fine balancing act that only Priceline’s Dry Shampoo can help with. Yes, it is as gross as it sounds but it’s the only thing that works so for anyone who knows the struggle and you should seriously try it out!
3. If you’re a masochist, then you’ll really enjoy brushing your hair
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When I was little, my hair used to be so knotted that my mum said every morning sounded like I was singing James Brown songs with his signature “OW!” Today, things are even worse. I wish I was one of those magical people who are somehow able to repeatedly dye their hair and not slowly kill it, but I am not. Despite hair treatments and an abundance of conditioner, my hair is very damaged and that never becomes more obvious than when I’m trying to brush my hair immediately after my shower. Pro tip: use a wide toothed comb and try to think of happy thoughts as you sink into pure pain.
4. Your dye is living on borrowed time
Remember that time you thought “hey you know what would look great with my pin head? A bob!” and then you immediately regretted everything? Remember the months of anguish you spent trying to use hats to hide your shame until your hair finally grew out ages later? Well prepare for your hair to now inexplicably decide to grow heaps. When you wanted it long it refused, but now that you’re trying to avoid root maintenance it’s like your hair has found a will to live. As someone with dark brown hair who aspired to have pastel pink hair, roots were the bane of my existence. However, luckily trends like dark roots and light hair and even glitter roots are, like, so hot right now. So, natural brunettes rejoice!
5. Hope you like your hair colour because everything you own is now that colour
Your white shirt, your pillow case, your back and ears, your lounge, your hands, your white wall: all now coloured. At least it’s obviously a colour you’re keen on but it’s a good idea to invest in some bleach and remove attachments to the colour white.
6. The only colour that suits you is black
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Congratulations, your hair is now BEAUTIFUL! Unfortunately though, now it clashes with your whole wardrobe. If your hair is a cool tone, forget wearing any of your lovely warm autumn reds, oranges and browns. If your hair is a warm tone say goodbye to your summer beach blues, greens and purples. Matching your coloured hair with your outfits is now a daily chore, so sometimes it’s just easier to ban colour from your wardrobe. Take solace in black, white and grey, which will also help to make your hair the centrepiece of your look. Yay optimism!
