So it’s March 2016. You’re back at university after month of sweet, glorious freedom, when studying was only for summer school nerds and literature consisted of magazines and the 3 second article you read on how to fake tan your own back without having a huge white circle of hopelessness where your arm couldn’t reach.
Your brain consists of drunken memories of regretful nights at Dirty Fuse, but you’re ready to jump back on the uni bandwagon. It’s time to kick some goals, Harvard reference some boring articles that you may or may not have skim read to pick the line with the smartest sounding words, and present some Prezis in group assignments where you’re the only one who pulled your weight.
The only issue is, the idea of sitting through 8:30am lectures, writing blogs and taking exams that make you question all of your education thus far, can make you want to claw your own eyes out. So what do you do?! Fear not my fellow lazy, procrastinating friends I’m here to provide you with some genius tips to help you get that bachelor degree that you totally just scraped the bare minimum for! (P’s get degrees, am I right?)
- Detox and sort your shit out
Okay, so I have to be brutal and take the form of your angry Mum when you left a spoon in the sink on this one (basically the equivalent of murdering a family member in her eyes, ja feel?). You’ve used up all your sitting on the couch like a potato binge watching Sex and the City time, and it’s time to eat healthy again and allow your body to prosper. You are what you eat so stop the refined sugar, McDonalds and excess amount of carbs. This type of diet will only weigh you down and make you feel worse about your return to sleepless and boring nights. Remember those things called vegetables, fruit and exercise? Nope? Me either – but here’s your reunion. Enjoy!
- You don’t have to become a hermit crab
Don’t farewell your friends, family and bae like you’re shipping off to war for the next thirteen weeks. You may have to dramatically decrease social time, but you don’t have to erase it entirely – in fact, it can be healthy to take breaks to remember you’re a human of the world. If you have a morning free, grab coffee with a friend, have a set date night and make time for family dinner on Sunday night. It’s important to have a study life balance, or as close as you can get to one without sacrificing one or the other. Think of it as a love triangle where uni is your old, boring wife and your social life is your side chick. Work your multitasking magic.
- Make sure your heart is in it
If you’re genuinely hating life more than usual at uni, consider if you’re lazy or actually just not where you’re supposed to be. It’s never too late to swap subjects or withdraw from your degree altogether – trust me you aren’t alone. In the end you’re studying to create the big picture: a future job. Hit up your faculty help and ask for some advice.